“But as soon as you realize their true colors and what type of person they really are, it's. I've experienced that, and it's heartbreaking,” she says. “You don't need that type of person in your life. “If someone acts like that, feel sorry for them that they can't be a compassionate, loving human being,” she says, quickly allowing for the possibility that the other person may be going through stuff of their own. If people do try to shame you about anything regarding your health, physical or mental, or if they drop you from their lives after you share your health struggles, well, Hyland’s been there, too. “For anybody that wants to reach out to somebody but doesn't really know how because they're too proud or they think that they'll be looked upon as weak, it's not a shameful thing to say. She encourages others going through a hard time to be open about their feelings with their own support networks. Talking about her suicidal thoughts with someone close to her helped, Hyland says. “I had gone through of always being a burden, of always having to be looked after, having to be cared for,” she says, explaining her thought process during this dark time. She was afraid of adding another painful chapter to her book of lifelong health struggles, and anxious about feeling like she would be a burden to her loved ones, even as they insisted that she was not. “For a long time, I was contemplating suicide, because I didn't want to fail my little brother like I failed my dad,” she says. But it does.” As someone who self-identifies as a control freak and micromanager, she says she felt completely helpless. “When a family member gives you a second chance at life, and it fails, it almost feels like it's your fault. But the emotional trauma from the first rejection and fear that it would happen again was overwhelming, and detrimental to her mental health. The potential of a second kidney transplant was promising for Hyland’s physical health. I probably would have insisted on donating even if I wasn’t a match.” “I only cared about Sarah knowing that I had her back and that she was going to be OK.” Finding out he was a match made Ian feel like he could breathe again for the first time in months, he says, adding, “I’m about as stubborn as Sarah once I’ve made up my mind. “When Sarah first told me that she would need a second transplant, the initial wave of fear was washed over by a sense of resolution,” Ian Hyland, 23, told me in an email. A visit to the doctor revealed that her level of the waste product creatinine, which your kidneys are meant to remove from your blood, was higher than it had been before the transplant. “Your immune system will want to attack it and be like, ‘What is this? This is not supposed to be here.’” She was overcome with fatigue, and experienced frequent fevers and infections. “When you have an organ transplant, it's basically a foreign thing in your body,” she explains. In October 2016, Hyland’s body began to reject the kidney her father donated to save her life. To the public, that was pretty much it: Hyland needed a kidney, her dad gave her one, case closed. But Hyland’s kidney dysplasia was so severe that she went into kidney failure. Some people with only one dysplastic kidney go on to have few, if any, health problems related to the condition. Those cysts can disrupt the kidneys from doing their job of filtering waste products out of your blood. Kidney dysplasia causes your kidneys-those critical bean-shaped organs-to grow cysts. Hyland was born with kidney dysplasia, which essentially means her kidneys didn’t develop normally when she was in the womb.
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